I'm learning to do cryptic crosswords in 2024, and they are the worst

In 2024, I am learning to do cryptic crosswords. Last year I complained about Puzzmo's crossword clues being very US-centric and Excors commented that US and UK puzzles seem very different, both in their form and in the fact that UK crosswords are often crytpic. Which is true! Often if you see a "quick crossword" in a UK paper that means "crossword with clues that are general knowledge questions and not an archaic set of riddles - you know, for if you're waiting for the kettle to boil, or are an idiot". So I decided to look into how you actually do cryptics. It's way harder than I thought, but at the same time I did not realise it's just smug puns.